Friendships.

Friends come into our lives in many different ways. Our siblings and cousins are our first friends, closely followed by the children of neighbouring families. When we go to school we make a wider circle of friends, some of whom last a lifetime while others are more transient as we move on to different stages in our lives and new friendships. Many people attest to the lasting strength of friendships made at university as being the defining and longest lasting of bonds. Some of you may have also built friendships by post. I certainly had many penfriends as a teenager, none of which lasted, sadly, into adulthood.

Now modern technology allows for the renewal of friendships from the past. I have, through Facebook, renewed friendships from school and college but I have also made new friends with people from all over the world simply by playing some of the many games on Facebook. One such 'Facebook friend' has become a 'real' friend over the last couple of years, first through conversations and comments on Facebook and then with a direct meeting. Our respective offspring, in a real reversal of parental-child roles, voiced their reservations at our planned face-to-face meeting, warning that the other could be a) not who they claimed to be on-line and b) more specifically, an axe murderer! However, as we had expected, we have become great friends and continue to chat on Facebook and meet up when time and distance allow. We would never have met in 'real life' as it would have been extremely unlikely our paths would have crossed except through Facebook's reach.

Although that is the only friendship I have so far converted from 'Facebook friend' to 'real life friend' there are several others, met through games, with whom I would dearly love to meet and sincerely hope that it will be possible in the future.

Some of you may consider meeting a stranger 'brave' or 'weird' or 'risky'. I have certainly been told that. But I have to say that, naive as it may sound, I do consider that most people are basically good and decent human beings. Of course there are cases - too many cases - of young people being duped by predatory online personas; of men and women seeking love and attention being exploited by the unscrupulous. I have to say that the friendships I am talking about are equal and not based on need for affection or other reward. We chat as friends with a common interest and, like 'real life' friendships our relationship develops from there. The only difference is that we have never met except through the pages of our timelines on Facebook.

Recently I updated my status on Facebook saying I was going on holiday to Rome. As is usual many friends 'liked' the status and some made comments. Among these comments was one from a gaming friend who lived in Rome. She wished me a good holiday in the city and intimated it would be good if we could meet up as she worked in a restaurant near one of the places I had mentioned wishing to visit while there. Without much thought I replied that we could possibly drop in for lunch if time allowed on our tour and, apart from a few exchanges of advice about Rome and light chat we left it at that. 

On arrival, my friend again replied to a status on Facebook welcoming me to her city and wishing me a pleasant stay. Unfortunately, we were not able to stop in for lunch on the particular day of the tour in that area of the city but I checked the restaurant website and got favourable reviews from the reception staff at our hotel so we booked a table for dinner on our final evening in Rome. I then contacted my friend but unfortunately she would not be working that evening. However, she said she would let her colleagues know we were arriving and wished us a lovely evening. On arrival at the restaurant I could see that people recognised us (I am, as can be seen from my photo, rather obvious with my hair colour!). However, imagine my complete surprise when the cashier arrived at our table with a mobile phone saying my friend had called to talk to me! We had a short conversation and again she wished us a pleasant evening. How thoughtful of her to call just to say hello. It was completely unexpected but, I have to say it made my evening even more special.

We had a wonderful meal on our last evening in Rome and even though I had not managed to meet up with my new friend we had been able to speak for a short time on the phone. However, the surprises didn't end there. As we were leaving we were presented with a gift of wine which my friend had left for us! It was truly a wonderful end to a magical evening!

So, if you get the opportunity to make new friends through the new medium of the interwebs, please consider taking it with both hands. It is more likely to enrich your life that to place it in danger. (Although usual precautions are always advised!) I now look forward to returning to Rome so we can finally meet up someday. Until then we will be 'Facebook friends', which is just another way of saying 'friends'.